Pain!

Pain is an amazing thing. It totally colors my world. Everything I do is changed by it. When I contemplate a new task, I calculate how much it will hurt first. If I am feeling pretty good I calculate whether or not an activity will change that. It is no fun. It makes me even more emotionally labile than I usually am. I cry at the drop of a hat normally, now all I have to do is think of a hat and there I go. One pain makes the rest of my body hurt too. It causes inflammation everywhere and then the tension of holding my body in a pain-lesser position causes more pain. My kids look at me and feel sorry, but there is nothing they can do and my sweetheart feels bad but there is nothing else he can do either. I'm waiting for an appointment, hopefully it some easy fix that I have been putting off for too long. I hate not feeling up to par!