Fear

Fear can be a motivating factor in my life. Not the scary there's a bad guy in the house ready to kill me kind of fear. That is something I haven't had to deal with. And not the kind of fear that let's you deliver your own baby, that isn't good either. No, I'm talking about the fear of failure. When you set goals for yourself that have real consequences, and you're getting close to a deadline and you're not quite there. Yup, that what has been happening around here.

I have had a few goals that I have set for myself. First was to get my customer base built up and to qualify for a Chat to Chat that one of my mentors has set up. I was getting pretty close to not making it when a great friend put an order in that sent me way over. Thank you God for the perfect timing. Even though I have made that goal, I have set a goal to do it again but double for next month. Not only is it a nice bit of money to put in my "love you" account, but it sets a good example for those that are allowing me to mentor them.

I also had a goal of getting my house presentable by next Monday, when we are expecting about 50 people to come into my little piece of paradise (snicker, snicker). Well, that has been a bit stressful. Normally, I don't let the little things bother me. I can see them, but they just aren't that big a deal for me. But with lots of eyes looking, I really wanted to spiffy it up a bit. Then there was leak under the sink and the entire vanity had to be replaced. And we are still playing bedroom switcheroo and so there are 'things' everywhere. So just when one place gets close to looking good, then something else expands. Today is the first time I could see that we are going to make it. Oh yeah, did I mention that we were going to be doing a speech competition for 3 days this week and are spending an afternoon at the hair salon and still have to get mom in law to dialysis. I will all get done, I have faith in my family.

And then there was the big thing, that which means the most of all. I needed to get some of those fifty people invited to meet a friend of mine who is working to help us get free of the job. He has so much faith in us and I really don't want to disappoint him. My daughter has also started to work on developing a business of her own and was experiencing a bit of anxiety. So I had to set an example for her and call some people. After I had done a call, she did a one, and then I did a couple more. It was pretty exciting. I still have a few more to calls to make, but knowing she is watching me, makes it even more important to do. I fear disappointing her and my sweetheart, and my friend. It makes me step beyond my comfort zone and do the hard things.

p.s. And on top of it all it is supposed to snow...a lot...yeah, that's not good.